How advisable is ONLINE DATING?
Online dating has caught on in India or so it seems. In fact, it is surprising that it came up that late. With the kind of conservative and hypocritical attitudes that we have in our society towards relationships other than marriage and towards sex, one had expected online dating to have caught the imagination of the emotionally starved people much earlier. Not that many of us are not comfortable with the system of arranged marriages and social set-ups like parties and get togethers that make it possible for people to meet and get into relationships. But, somehow, online dating seems an easier and convenient option where one can get into a relationship at the flick of a mouse. Convenience is fine but just how healthy and safe is online dating when you consider the fact that you might be entering into a life long commitment? What if the online date turns out to be a stalker? What if what you thought as love was just a temporary fling?
Substitute for a literal social circle
There are innumerable persons today who will vouch for the fact that online dating is a fun way of getting to know interesting people. You get more choices and you too have the choice of dumping someone who you don’t like without any qualms unlike in a real relationship which can get a wee bit complicated when it comes to winding up. Love is easy to find and experience on the net or so it seems. And for persons who have not been successful in getting mates or friends in real life in real social circles, online dating is a blessing in disguise. In fact, many people date several people simultaneously not knowing which could be the right one!
And here lies the catch. The more the choice, the more the chance of a lack of commitment. When you are busy trying to choose, select, count and even maintain the number of online dates, you are bound to concentrate less on a probable relationship. What matters to you is that you could be losing out on some great date if you didn’t search enough. And so, you don’t give enough attention to any one date. You become more obsessed with gathering dates and the search never stops until you get fed up and you realize that you are finally left with no quality relationship in hand. Older men and women are known to prowl for younger women and men irrespective of the fact that they are already married. It becomes a pastime for them, to flirt and even have cybersex. Husbands and wives are known to get into such relationships without any qualms. Infidelity, I suppose is okay as long as it stays in the mind. Not my kind but it exists. Again, there are the dangers of people lying through their teeth when dating online. It is easier to portray a different, more charming YOU than what you actually are. So, the time and energy invested in an online relationship could end in heartbreak and a person who no longer wants to trust. Wouldn’t an ordinary relationship have been better?
Again, the real world is not a safe place either. Heartbreaks abound in plenty here too. But at least, you seem to have a hold on something. Online it seems that you are only courting a breeze that made you feel special for a while and then suddenly ‘poof’ it was gone. For some, it is better than staying lonesome in the real world! I am not saying that all online dating is unwise. If that was the case then we wouldn’t be having so many popular online dating sites. According to a recent report (the BBC World Service Global poll), India has some of the greatest enthusiasts in the world for online dating. With recession affecting many, people are taking time out to get and develop contacts on the net.
Online dating is easy. For the unmarried and uncommitted, it is a chance to find someone with whom you can share or/and probably get into a relationship. For the bored and frustrated ones (married or not) it is an opportunity to experience the thrill of a new relationship without any tags attached. In spite of its advantages do you think that it is any time better than a real relationship in the literal world?
I would love to know what you feel friends.